3 Toxic Lies That Will Kill Your Dreams

I never imagined a lie changing my life. But it did. And it can happen to you. From phobias and mental disorders to joy aversion and paralyzed dreams.

dale-partridge

People who believe lies, miss life. They fall into the grips of a counterfeit existence and fail to grasp what they were truly intended for. They have no basis for the truth, no courage to find it, and no idea they need it.

Because sadly… people don’t believe lies because they have to, it’s because they want to.

My life has always been a little different than most. Coming from a childhood in Southern California I was always the popular kid, the talented athlete, and I had a knack at being mischievous, manipulative, and sly.

When I graduated from high school, I did what culture told me to do. And I was good at it. Buy nice things. Date beautiful women. And party harder than anyone you know.

24 months later, I found myself emotionally bankrupt. I was in debt, unhealthy, and broken. 

In a political science class at my local community college, I met a gentlemen who was 10 years older than me. For some peculiar reason we became quite close. Maybe he saw himself in me or maybe he believed our relationship had some future significance. A few months later, I received a call asking to meet at the Starbucks near my home in Rancho Cucamonga. After getting our drinks, he sat me down at a tiny table in the back corner and the first words that left his lips were:

“Dale, everything you think is right… is wrong.” 

And while I don’t have the time to share the details of my reaction and my transformation here with your today, it was this lesson that opened my eyes to how dangerous a lie can be for my future.

This year, I am the same age that my friend was when he told me that truth. And over the past ten years, I have been an entrepreneur. I’ve been a dreamer. I’ve been a go-getter. And I’ve been the example to the over 500,000 loyal readers of this blog, who desire to do the same.

Loving your work is important. It’s my belief that everyone in this country has the ability to find a career that fulfills their purpose, brings them joy, offers them freedom, and produces them wealth. Sadly, this is the minority. And that’s why today, I’m going to share 3 toxic lies that can steal your professional dreams. They are not rare, but common. And it might make you realize that everything you think is right about work, is wrong.

Lie #1: I Can’t Start Until I’m Smart

I don’t know how many times I’ve heard someone say, “I don’t think I’m smart enough to start yet.” While there is a touch of validity in that statement, stalling your dream, your business, your passion, your craft, or your career simply because of a lack of knowledge IS NOT SMART.

The truth is this: Behind every great success was a beginner.

Someone who had no history and who had no results. Someone who knew very little about what they are now an expert in. And just like you, they had a dream that required faith. Faith that even without knowing how to proceed, they would succeed.

What average people don’t know about above-average people is that success is 80% action and only 20% intelligence. Starters learn by doing, not learning to do.

It’s okay to not feel ready. It’s alright to not feel qualified. It’s acceptable to not feel confident. But it’s not okay to let that stop you. The world tells us get educated prior to your pursuit. Success says get educated through your pursuit. Don’t wait until you know. Start so that you can know.

Lie #2: It’s Okay To Not Have It All Figured Out

This one is powerful. It radiates false wisdom. What makes it so toxic is it’s disguise. It’s a half-truth. Any idiot knows that nobody has it all figured out. And as well-intentioned as this lie is, it ultimately promotes the acceptance of being lost. The permission to be confused. The approval of mediocre.

Because it’s common not to have life figured out. It’s common to make bad decisions. It’s common to live in an apartment well into your 30’s. It’s common to be in debt. It’s common to hate your job.

But it’s not normal. 

It’s normal to fight against uncertainty. It’s normal to gain understanding. It’s normal to overcome your obstacles. And it’s normal to succeed.

One might argue that “figuring it out” = maturity. And maturity is tough. If you simply rewrite this quote with a more accurate wording, it might say something like this: “It’s okay to not be mature.”

When you look at those who seem to have life “figured out”: A strong family, a thriving business, a beautiful home, freedom, and wealth, you’re looking at a person who doesn’t accept this lie. To them, they have it figured out. And if something arises that they don’t understand, it’s never accepted. It’s conquered.

Lie #3: Having A Job Is More Secure Than Working For Yourself

Mass employment is a relatively new idea. If we just go back 150 years, almost every person on the planet was self-employed. They had no hours, no boss, no limited paycheck. But if history tells us one thing it’s this:

People run to what is convenient. We flock to what is easy. Employment is easy. But the question is this: Is employment safe?

In 2008, over 15.4 million people lost their job. Not due to poor performance. But due to a poor economy. For 7.7 million of those people, it took two years to find comparable work.

What people don’t realize is this: when you work for a large company, your financial security is only as secure as that company. And most likely that company is not controlled by you. It is controlled by management and is dependent on whether they make the right decisions. And when it becomes necessary to cut expenses, who do you think is most susceptible to getting the ax? You are, of course.

On the contrary, when I (Dale) need to make more money, I can create a new product, run a sale, or get inventive. In other words, I can make it happen, on demand. And it’s based on one person – me. I can control my income, my security, and my future. So, who is more secure in an economic downturn? The person who has to hope their boss makes the right decisions? Or the boss himself?

Not everyone is built for entrepreneurship. But more of us are than we’d like to believe. “Getting a degree and landing a good job” is a dying way of thinking. Because we know what that looks like:

Go into debt, give up 4 years of your life, maybe land a temporary job you enjoy, and have only one revenue stream.

If you enjoy being an employee, great. But if you’re an employee because you think it’s safer, I have one message for you. Stop putting your future in the hands of others. Stop being a slave to the cultural mindset:

Fall in line, keep your head low, work for the paycheck, retire and die.

When you do as everybody else does, it gives a sense of security. And when people like me decide to go another way, we have people telling us it’s risky. That there is a chance of failure. That we should prepare for failure. All I take away from this is: when you stick your head above the crowd, somebody might try to shoot it off.

The first step to success, in many ways, is to disagree with the status quo. To be different and to alter ordinary behavior. So here’s your permission. Replace this lie with truth. Launch your own business and start something that awakens your soul.

Need Help Getting Started? 

If you’re ready to prepare yourself. To put your mind into action. To take the next step in turning your passion into a profession, then let me help you. It’s my mission to teach people how to escape ordinary and find the vibrant life their heart desires. I’ve put together a COMPLETELY FREE, 40 minute webinar titled: How To Start A Business In 30 Days. I’ll be hosting this class for the next few weeks, but seats are limited. Save your spot by registering below:

Register For Dale’s Free Webinar”
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Author

Dale Partridge
Dale Partridge is the Founder of StartupCamp.com. He's also a keynote speaker and author of the Wall Street Journal & USA Today Bestselling book People Over Profit.

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  1. Rex says:

    You’re incredibly awesome at what you do. God bless you!

    Reply
  2. I needed all of this today. Thank you, Dale. Your posts are so inspiring and truly helpful! I can always count on them to have solid, meaningful content. This is one I’ll have to chew on for a while to let all these truths sink in.

    Reply
  3. I like these points. Completely agree on point 1 and started my business and learned all I could as I went. Especially when customers would ask questions. This in turn drove me to find out more and then even answer questions to those with more experience on some topics and write help articles and blogs on a few of those items. For point 2. When I read it I sighed a relief. But then realized it’s the lie. Which then immediately gave me anxiety. I’m not sure how to handle this one since I def don’t have it all figured out. I want to of course! But I know it’s going to take time and will require managing things not to get overwhelmed. Which is seriously tough. How do you manage that?

    Reply
    • Great point, Serge. Keep up with the articles on this blog and take a look at joining StartupCamp. It may be what you need to get it all figured out.

      Reply
  4. Shariqa says:

    Hi Dale!
    Thanks for sharing your story its really inspiring and motivational. Its true that we are stuck with our lies and it is difficult to cross a hurdle that we create for ourself. I’m looking forward to the webinar session so that i can use your help to figure out my passion and take a step to become self employed.
    Regards 🙂

    Reply
    • Awesome! Thanks for the support. Excited to have you at the webinar.

      Reply
  5. KEMARIBS says:

    Thanks alot for sharing Dale
    This article is an eye opener for me
    I am presently a paid employee but run a bakery at home but due to working hours I do not have enough time to bake week days but weekends only
    I am thinking of resigning and facing my business full time!

    Reply
  6. Hey Dale! Thanks for this piece. I started my private therapy practice in June while remaining an “employee” for the county. At the start of this new year, I’m jumping in and committing solely to my business! I’m thrilled and as you stated, Ive been awaken to what I whole-heartedly feel I’m here to do. Nonetheless, it is scary to branch out, stick your head above the crowd… This article reassured that part of me that is feeling the inherent vulnerability of stepping out of the comfort zone. Thank you for the permission to let go of these lies and to regain confidence. Cheers! Merry Christmas! Happy New Year!

    Reply
    • That’s the truth. Glad you enjoyed this piece. Take care Jessica 🙂

      Reply
  7. I’m registered! Looking forward to the webinar! I found you a few months ago and I LOVE what you’re doing! I’m already enrolled in a course creation course, but once I’m finished that course and implementing what I learn, I’m definitely enrolling for your program! It looks so valuable! We are entrepreneurs and our self education never ends. Our best self education comes when we implement and try and tweak, etc. Just added your course to my list of programs to invest in!

    Reply
  8. I agree with you on this! As someone who is self-employed, I love the flexibility of my work and income. If I want more money, absolutely I will get creative and teach a new class, event etc.

    Reply

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